Hate

Hate.

Anger.

Betrayal.

How much can we own and how much do we accurately assign?

You understand the context on both sides, you get where the other is coming from, yet you still feel completely F’d the the Nth degree.

Rage? Forgive? Let go? Accept? Move on? Confront? Fight? Inquire?

High school? Immature? An area for growth at a more adult level? Ridiculous? A lack of respect and honor?

Now it’s time for you to fill in the blank:

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When to start writing?

So I hit one of those places where I never find time to write, but in fact, I’m probably looking for the time it would take to write some manifesto or something.

All of nothing. It sort of is how I operate, even though I know it.

But there’s lots of my mind, in my heart, testing my soul…no shortage of things to write about.

I also seem to dance between living in the moment and stopping to write. Again, one or the other, not necessarily a balance of both.

I recently purchased Julie Cameron’s “The Right to Write” – I’ve been a big fan of her work for a long time. With a dissertation that needs to really start soon, massive transitions, and the need to integrate a great deal of teaching and learning, I thought it might help me out. Gonna crack it open while the boys are outside.

We’ll see where it leads me. Sparrow taught me to say “yes” to the unfolding. I have one particular outcome in mind, and it might be time to let that go and say yes to what comes.

Rites of Passage – Allergies

It seems a bit odd to me to put the rites of passage and allergies together, but there really is a reason.

I did not have allergies growing up.  At all.  Then, cats and pollen and who knows what else started bothering me.  Spring became a difficult time since I love to be outside and I would get just filled with sinus pressure and misery.  This happened year after year.  10+ years later, I think it’s time to accept that fact that I have allergies.  Really.  😉

So as a rite of passage to personhood, to soul self (a la Bill Plotkin and others), adulthood self, etc., it’s time to just say aloud, “I have allergies.”

I am a part of the landscape.  I exist here in this time and place.  I can use medicine.  All of these are lessons I have learned recently in the past year, and they apply to allergies.  Yes, allergies.

Acceptance.  Saying “Yes” to the unfolding of life.  Sometimes this acceptance ss not so glamorous or intense or mind-blowing.  It’s just dealing with allergies.

And the wild thing about all of this?  Even though I am declaring this aloud now, I have been closer to acceptance over the past year.  This season, even though we had a long, beautiful, white winter here in New Hampshire, I am hardly being bothered by them at all.

Moving through (…or something…)

Onward and upward.