Ok, this is veeeeery annoying…

Soooo, I can either throw ecto under the bus for not posting the body of this first post to the blog, or I can pretend that I never hit save (I DID!) and what uploaded (a blank post) is what I had.

Regardless, here’s to coming back into the game, distracted, unorganized, desperately still in need of dissertation progress, and ready to kick the sh*t out of anything that interrupts my flow and momentum on writing.
* clicks “SAVE” *

It. Returns. To. Life. (Part 2)

It. Returns. To. Life

I guess I did it…

…but I’m not ready to check this one off. One entry for each? Ok, I’m a perfectionistic dump oftentimes so I don’t write. Plus they are currently both on my nightstand, and by the time I enter my own horizontal position near my nightstand, it’s lights out, people.

But it’s started. I need to shorten entries up. Of course, I’d rather just videotape the whole mad scene every single moment since it’s generally all breathtaking (even if my breath is sucked out from chasing the 3 year old or from trying to tear my skin off my skin). If I can manage one a month, or one a week, then I’m crossing this puppy off.

See more progress on: Start a Journal for Each of My Boys

Take me to the river, drop me in the water.

As an ex-whitewater river guide, River has taught me many things, possibly even more once I stopped guiding. So this is one of my main metaphors for this project. And I have some things lines up, like meds (!), time, and almost a bit of clarity. Drop me in the river dammit, because I know how to navigate and survive WITH holding on to a sense of wonder and awe while I’m in it.

Now (here comes Mr. Excuse) if only this neuropsych testing report would go away so I could just focus on this proposal…hard to cook and run a river, so having two big things at once is a reasonable cough excuse.

But I’m all for nudging others if in fact I can get nudged, too! Let’s have substantial (all??) portions of our proposals done by Monday, August 31, 2009. I’m done with my Internship on Friday, August 28, so I’m allotting a day or so to party and recover. It’s the least I can do after being torn about this year.

By the way, I also do not know what the final form will look like either. Qualitative is the direction I’m leaning, but if I can do a quantitative project, that would be cool, too. I haven’t done one full-bore before, and I’d like the experience. Of course, the best dissertation is a DONE dissertation, and I also have the option of doing a program design/evaluation that would line up what I would do with data, but by proposing a program, I don’t have to actually carry it out. A bit more work on the front end (proposal) but a great project nonetheless, and it might be something I can actually implement (like my own little business plan).

Ok, start paddling. “All ahead!”

Cell Phone P0rn

Ok, back to some of the basics, such as cell phone p0rn.

Anyone in the same boat as me? So the next iPhone is likely going to be introduced very soon. 3.0 seems to be just what I’ve been waiting for. The App Store has anything and everything one could want, and I’ve even read in a few places (ok, likely one report regurgitated 100 times) that AT&T may reduce the monthly charges by $10.

So, is it time to take the plunge?

I’m been pretty damn happy with my Curve on Verizon. The Curve keeps me entertained just enough to feel like it’s the right device, but I’ve got a wandering eye.  The Storm 2 might be nice if I’m going to just end up staying with Verizon.  People reasonably satisfied with the first one?  Know anything about the second one?

Palm on Sprint? Not that crazy about it. I actually don’t like the form factor too much. Just doesn’t do it for me. Stick with Verizon? It is the best service around, and now that we’re settled in this new metro area, I STILL hear people saying that AT&T service leaves much to be desired (I’m in Mamaroneck, NY and have been working in Stamford, CT).

Conveniently enough I forget to think about the cash that would have to leave my hands for the switch to the iPhone. That cash is, of course, multiplied by two unless I am truly desiring being single again and not live with the two cutest boys on the planet. Pay for setup, phones, apps…just coming off 5 years of being broke ass (well, still broke ass for now until my dissertation is done) is not the best time for this. But…

Folks still happy with their iPhones? Anyone gotten used to a keyboard like the Curve’s and then made the switch to just typing on the screen? I’ve gotten pretty fast, and I know there are folks that can’t live without a real keyboard. Personally, I’d like to be less tied to any device, but well, I take that back. I probably do.

Added 5/26:  I also wonder how many Blackberry apps will be available that remotely come close to what works on the iPhone/iPod Touch.  I am a Mac user so it’s obvious which device will be a better fit.  I’ve been thinking that I’ll go freaking bonkers if AT&T’s service sucks, and maybe it’s time to just go iPod Touch. 

Wait for a newer model after June?  Wait unti they’re sold with 3.0?  Anyone happy with their iPod Touch AND Verizon phone?  Might be a good time to cut back on the Blackberry $30 expense, too, then.  But BBM, some email, being online, etc. seem like nice bonuses.  The Touch would be more like a pda and toy only.  Hrmm…

Time to Sell My Klipsch RF-3 Speakers?

Uggh.

It may be time to part with my babies. The house we moved into this past November had a surround sound stereo set-up already in place. Some of it was built it, and rather than take it apart to sell it, it might be time to sell the Klipsch’s.

They are RF-3s in pretty damn good condition. They are currently boxed up (original boxes) from our move, so unfortunately I’m going to have to take them out to take pictures of them.

One of the grilles has some broken plastic pieces. Sounds like this has happened to others. The grilles stay on fine, but if I were keeping them, I’d try some sort of super glue or epoxy to get them back to new. Other than that, I don’t even think there are scratches on them.

This sucks because the NAD receiver that I had paired with them went perfectly. NAD is really warm, and the Klipsch’s are a bit stronger on the high end. I guess I should sell both.

Uggh.

It’s going to be hard to part with these.

Time to Write

The Time to Write

The Right to Write (Julia Cameron)

Write Toward the Light

Writing Right (or Left)

Rites of Writing

Pass the Writing

Write ’til the Light

Write-On

Soulcraft, Rumi, and a Dissertation

I never fell asleep. Maybe it was the Ladysmith Black Mambazo playing in the background of our room, something to help me sleep. Maybe it was that shot or three of flat Mountain Dew I pounded just before heading to bed (why was that here? I so rarely drink soda now) keeping me up. There are at least a dozen other associations that come to mind.

But I think I just found what I needed to move forward with my dissertation proposal. Connection after connection. And I woke up. Right to the laptop and type type type. Head to bed? Well, let’s pull this one book out to put some form to this line of thought. “Soulcraft” by Bill Plotkin. I know it well. I flip to the Contents.

And what is before me on the page, at 1:12am after getting out of bed on this Tuesday night now Wednesday, discovering the missing links that seemed to keep my project from moving forward, from keeping me from carrying out my vision “on this side of the trees,” from completing this fairly insane process?

The same quote that Julie, my wife, painted on our bedroom wall in New Hampshire while I was away in New Mexico on my Vision Quest the summer of ’07. Rumi:

“The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you.

Don’t go back to sleep.

You must ask for what you really want.

Don’t go back to sleep.

People are going back and forth across the doorsill

Where the two worlds touch.

The door is round and open.

Don’t go back to sleep.”

Getting Things Done As If It Really Matters

New Year’s Eve. New Year’s resolutions. Time to start fresh.

I usually don’t give a rat’s ass about January 1 as a time to start something new. Maybe I operate on different cycles, Maybe I have different motivators. But it doesn’t matter much to me.

Oh, and I have a pretty bad track record of follow through, discipline, willpower in many areas of my life. Avoidance seems to be an obvious way to avoid disappointment.

But I still have a DO problem…a getting things done problem. Too much on my plate but no matter, lots of these things really need to get done. Dissertation screams and needs to be wrapped up by the end of summer.

I like tinkering (aka dicking around) with GTD methods and devices and tools and hacks. I’m up-to-speed on just about everything out there.

But, no amount of GTD software or ideas can really get that train moving.

One piece that seems to be missing is something in the realm of peer pressure or “caring” by someone else (caring as wonderfully described by Milton Mayeroff’s “On Caring“). A support group, people who are engaged and willing to help one get toward your goals. Allies, human or otherwise.

I have allies. I have worked to figure them out. I have not summoned them well. I have difficulty with object permanence, so I don’t “hold” them in my awareness on a regular basis very well.

One area that strikes me as a possibility, a real possibility, is some form of online support. Maybe finally doing hyperlinks on this blog, posting to sites, and connecting to the outside world will help this. I see all these communities, I lurk, but I never walk through the door. I’m also sure there’s same lameass “THAT’S only for other people” thing going on. You often feel excluded when you’re in new territory.

So, I’m going to try it. This year.

Some slick new ideas swimming around my head, including software such as Lifetick and BubbleTimer, have come on my radar. Emailing the folks that make it, that use it, that live it, touching case. All of that stuff.

If someone would kick me down an iPod Touch, I surely would be in the Things or OmniFocus realm, among others. There are really slick apps and if I have the device in front of me all the time. My Curve has some potential, but it’s not working for me too well just yet.

I’ll post how it goes.

Relate to this? Let’s connect.

Happy New Year.